Soooo, its been a while, right?
I could start with excuses, but I wont. I will give an explanation.
My life went completely off the rails. I’ve mentioned my epilepsy, and my depression.
I went to uni. Which sucked. Honestly don’t go unless you really really have to for your career. My conditions got the better of me and turned a 3 year degree into four, with deferred exams into the fifth. Which is very soon.
In that time I had to work a normal job. Writing is hard at the best of times. Its insanely difficult with depression. Plus I had solid commitments. I had to study, attend labs, lectures, and work a full time job to pay my way.
I’ve been constantly telling myself that I will get back on the writing horse, and I have been. There are multiple half written stories on my computer. Most of them could be whipped into reasonable shape if my brain will give me a rest for a month or two. If that happens I will let you know.
What woke me up to actually writing to publish is that some lovely reader commented here very recently. I’ve been toying with the idea, since moving.
Oh, yeah, I moved. Now for most of you this will seem like nothing, but I have moved 5 whole hours away from where I was before. I was in the middle of a mid sized city in the midlands in England. Now I am a few miles away from a very small city on the south coast. I don’t drive and the buses are terrible. All in all its been traumatic and I miss my old house and city, and being close to my friends and family.
So that happened and it kinda made me think that I should get back to writing and maybe turn it into my job. I did okay before, thanks to you all.
I dont know if its because I am unemployed and the job hunt is depressing but there is something incredibly appealing about working for myself. The main issue, well, there are several.
The first is that I will need a job shortly, and that job hunting is terrible and takes up a lot of mental energy.
The second is that I realised something. My writing before was to avoid something big in my life. It gave me a focus and outlet. I could just sit there and write for 12-16 hours a day and ignore everything around me.
Now, despite the medical depression from moving and job hunting and whatnot, I am actually settled in my life. I’ve got nothing to hide from.
(You may be able to tell that I’ve had a lot of therapy in the last few years. It helped.)
Im writing again. It’s not magelife, sorry. Its slow and Im very judgy of myself. Stuff has happened, but should be settling down now. Hopefully I will be able to stay engaged with you guys.